For my highschool play, I run the soundboard which controls the sounds that go off during the play. At the beginning of a scene one of the actors is supposed to be on his phone “texting” and it turns out he was just texting people gibberish the whole time
This time it happened to be me

tastefullyoffensive:

Overprotective parents. [x]

hejibits:

Gun perspective in FPS games doesn’t make any sense.

(Source: hejibits.com)

sickledsnake:

itsdorkgirl:

gravemakers-and-gunslingers:

BOND is a tiny touch module. It can be a pendant or a bracelet but it comes in pairs. You keep one and you give one to a friend. When you touch it, your friend feels it. No matter where they are on the planet. We don’t do tweets, we do tickles.

we need this

gonna put it on my dick

THAT IS NOT THE INTENDED USE SIR

(Source: ldrsociety)

So I’ve found one guy who does two of the greatest things at the same time

If you were an icecream you’d be chocolate fudge (because you look like shit)

kodyprofanity:

Named my dick Mike Tyson ‘cause he breaks jaws

And eats ears

Named my dick Mike Tyson ‘cause he breaks jaws